真的累了

雨又在下了
看外面又湿了
我一直等着
让屋里灯都亮着
这样伤心的睡了
这样压抑的醒了
想着你又来了
可该变的都变了
而孤独是什么
心冷是什么
情是什么
你是什么
我不要再想了
我已经倦了
我不想再唱了
我已经哭了
想陪你坐着
想听你说着
想知道我值得
以为我们还爱着
把窗户都开着
风也是凉的
我一个人唱歌
声音也变成冷的
而孤独是什么
心冷是什么
情是什么
你是什么
我不要再想了
我已经倦了
我不想再唱了
我已经哭了
而孤独是什么
心冷是什么
情是什么
你是什么
我不要再想了
我已经倦了
我不想再唱了
我已经哭了
我不想再唱了
我已经哭了
雨又在下了

回忆起今年的生日

今天刚刚考完最后一张测验，可是即将来临的年末考快把我给压死了，压力真的很大很大~
看完了第十集的《是美男啊》，静静地想起很多东西~也想起了我今年在他家里庆祝的生日~呵呵~
虽然礼物不是当天收到的，可是她却做了很浪漫的事情~

第一个惊喜:



































第二个惊喜:

他很好笑耶，自己在颈项上绑了个蝴蝶结说自己是我的生日礼物~哈哈哈~其实它真正给我的生日礼物是一个女性钱包，很贵很漂亮~很心痛那个钱~感动死了~T.T





























第三个惊喜:



这是他在我生日的前几天送给我的情侣戒指~没错的话，应该是在KL的Time Square买的吧！呵呵~^.^

是时候去读书了！！待会儿还要跟怡雯去吃sushi呢！呵呵~~~tata...

Introduction of You Are Beautiful

Recently I fall in love with An.Jell!! They are a band from a korean series called You're Beautiful~是美男啊or原来是美男~The storyline is very attractive!! Ever since the taiwanese drama , this is the second drama made me addicted in it! This is one of the best drama i ever watched! The soundtrack are really awesome every episode are differently songs which is totally hooked and make me sing too~~It’s been long time since I’ve felt this level of excitement and anticipation bout a drama. I adore every episode which are excellent example of quality dramas. All the cast perfect are portrayed their character perfectly esp Park Shin Hye, Jang Geun Suk, Lee Hongki, Jung Yong Hwa also the president and the manager are really one of kind role.

Even though they are not the most handsome or prettiest celebrities, but they have their own way to attract ppl~~~Goodbye Goo Jun Pyo and Hello Hwang Tae Kyung!!! hehehe~~~

Below are the introduction of this drama:

Trailer 1-Please click me^.^
Trailer 2-Please click me^.^

This the first public performance of A.N. JELL!!

Title: 미남이시네요 / You’re Beautiful
Chinese Title : 原来是美男啊
Also known as: You’re Handsome, A.N.JELL
Genre: Romance, comedy
Episodes: 16
Broadcast Network: SBS
Broadcast period: 2009-Oct-07 to 2009-Nov-26
Air time: Wednesday & Thursday 21:55

Synopsis

Tae Kyung and On Yu are in search of a new member for their idol group, A.N.JELL. However, Mi Nam suffers an injury at the last moment. So Mi Nyu, his twin sister, is asked to step in for her brother. The rest of the drama follows the behind-the-scenes life of an idol group.

Cast

Jang Geun Suk as Hwang Tae Kyung
Park Shin Hye as Go Mi Nam / Go Mi Nyu
Lee Hong Ki as Kang On Yu / Jeremy
Jung Yong Hwa as Kang Shin Woo

Extended cast

UEE as Yoo He Yi
Bae Geu Rin as Sa Yu Ri (Fan club president)
Kim In Kwon as Ma Hoon Yi (Mi Nam’s manager)
Choi Ran as Choi Mi Ja (Mi Nam & Mi Nyu’s aunt)
Kim Sung Ryung as Mo Haw Ran
Jung Chan as President Ahn
Choi Soo Eun as Wang Kko Di

Production Credits

Director: Hong Sung Chang
Screenwriter: Hong Jung Eun & Hong Mi Ran

　　韩剧《是美男啊》讲述了10多岁偶像组合成员的成长 过程以及围绕他们发生的爱情和纠葛。讲述了农村出身的淳朴少年偶然成为偶像组合的一员后所经历的各种故事。通过张根锡饰演的男主演的成长历程，向人们展示 了少年偶像们普通人的一面和他们在华丽的舞台背后经历的鲜为人知的痛苦。而朴信惠则是将一人饰演两个双胞胎兄妹，与张根锡上演浪漫爱情戏。

　　[剧名]:是美男啊/原来是美男

　　[英文名]:Ah yes Fumio

　　[播送]:韩国SBS

　　[首播]:2009年10月7日

　　[时间]:每周三四晚北京时间20点50分各播放一集

　　[导演]:洪成昌（《人间市场》《土地》《再次微笑》《媳妇儿和少奶奶》《相爱的好日子》）

　　[编剧]:洪静恩、洪美兰（洪氏姐妹）（《豪杰春香》《My Girl》《快刀洪吉童》《幻想情侣》）

　　[主演]:张根锡 李弘基 朴信惠 郑勇华 金宥真 金成铃 郑灿 金仁权 崔兰 崔秀 恩裴格 林太皇

　　[集数]:16集

You can watch online follow the link below:
Watch online with English subtitile
Watch online with Chinese subtitle

And can also listen to the songs in OST!! Below are the music videos of the OST!!
OST-Please click me^.^

I am so loving this drama, it has easily become one of my fave, lose count already how many times I’ve watched each and every episodes just to pass the time till Wednesday comes again….this really is one of the best Kdrama ever, got a great storyline/plot, got an amazing actors/actresses from the main down to the supporting ones, got an amazing OST too!…just loooooveeee JGS singing voice….I don’t know how those ratings were taken but one thing is certain - this drama is a must see. Never a dull moment.

After watching Boys Over Flowers I thought it is the only one great romance comedy for 2009 I was wrong this series Your beautiful is so Wonderful too fun to watch and everything the acting top notch of three guys are such amazing actors for their generation. Park Shin Hye is beautiful and funny.

I just can’t think of the twist that this story will bring… im really anxious!!! The song without words is really captivating… i wanna hear it everytime.. huhu.. its full of emotions..It’s the only series I’ve watch this year that I wasn’t skipping scenes.

Haiz....I shud end my blog here! Cuz i'm going to watch the latest episode now! Episode 9~After that, must study ler.......sobs sobs....

堕落

最近好懒惰 也很没心情 到底是怎么了
每天计划好要完成的事都没有心去做
不是看戏不然就是上网
这样好颓废没用
我该怎样找到我的动力来读书
comm的东西又让我烦恼
总觉得压力很大 什么事情都不顺心
也很想一直把自己关起来
不出去 不说话 不想逼自己笑
好想就这样一个人静一静
好希望什么烦恼都没有
可是我很讨厌现在的自己
真的很没用 像个废物一样
动力，你到底在哪里？
我已经厌倦了那些在大家面前要勉强笑的生活
不喜欢戴着面具过日子
我想做回我自己
我想要过自己想要的生活
我想要没有规划随心所欲地生活
但 我知道
这是永远都不可能的

消逝的友情。幸福的爱情。

好久没来写部落格了~最近很忙，很多comm的东西要处理~尤其是GLC要到了，mid term test全部都在同一天，还有report要赶~我真的觉得我人生开始混乱~很怕这个sem会因为CCA而fail我的modules~一天24小时真的不够用~



我的爱情渐渐上了轨道~还蛮开心的。也许我经常只是写吵架的部分，很少和大家分享比较甜蜜的部分所以让很多人觉得我在爱情里是很被动的。呵呵。其实经过了8个月后，我觉得现在比以前稳定许多。而且是比较成熟性的恋爱~看起来我们很粘可是其实我们都常常会有自己的个人空间。在房间里一起读书或者他玩他的多大，我忙我自己的活动。甜言蜜语只是一些外在促进感情的调味品，但其实我们的心里慢慢达成共识。在大家面前，我觉得我们都很爱面子，哈哈，不会说一些很喜欢对方的话，一直斗嘴，可是私底下其实还是蛮甜蜜的。


在这场恋爱，我不知道我们可以一起走到多久~我不能给一个肯定也无法给一个承诺更无法确定我们之间会有“永远”这个约定，毕竟很多事情是我们无法预料的。但是至少在我们彼此心里，目前的我们是很希望可以有未来，但是还是得看缘份。


跟他在一起后，我发现自己改变了很多很多~最近听秋秋darling说我成熟了很多，她跟我聊心事后觉得舒服了很多，我听了后觉得很欣慰，我终于也有长大的一天~哈哈~其实yonglee教会了我很多很多道理，虽然不是每件事他都是对的，但是至少有些事情让我成长，也让我变得比较看得开也比较大方，想法也开放了一些。但是跟他比起来我还是比较保守的。


不安的感觉还是会一直存在。因为我才21岁，对将来的事情都抱着不肯定的态度，也很担心我们会有分开的一天，但是我对他的信任一天比一天增加更多，我相信只要双方都抱着这样的态度努力维持感情应该可以做到的。



我不知道我上辈子做了什么坏事，老天爷要这样对我，总觉得我的人生一直会遇到和朋友反目成仇的事情。重点是我什么都没有做。也许我的想法和我男朋友差不多，我觉得很多东西是应该要体谅和大方，不能为了小事吃醋。如果我为了一点点很小的事情吃醋，yonglee一定会觉得我很幼稚，但我认同，所以我也变得不喜欢这种幼稚的行为。逐渐地我也变得比较可以接受很多事情。男女之间是可以纯友情的。至少我对得起自己的良心因为全世界的人都知道我只对我的男朋友专一~虽然我有很多可以聊心事的男性朋友可是完全是纯友谊，而且我跟男生朋友做什么yonglee都会知道，他都觉得很正常没什么。所以我也不明白我做错什么让一对情侣经常为了我吵架。而且这件事严重到我同时失去两个曾经都是跟我很要好的朋友。一个是可以聊心事的朋友，一个是可以一起十指紧扣出去逛街的朋友。


很多事情都在改变。我也不知道我自己真正的知心朋友是谁？因为这件事对我造成的影响很大。我不敢再相信任何友情。朋友随时会因为爱情误会我讨厌我然后连打招呼都做不到。以前中学时也发生类似的事，我也是什么都没有做，就因为一个男生而一起杯葛我。我的人生难道就遇不到一个能真正了解我的为人明白我的好朋友吗？


在我心里，家人永远是第一名，无可取代。不管是爱情还是友情，随时都会有离开我的危机。我不能太依赖友情和爱情。很害怕，到最后受重伤的还是我自己。

幸福背后的辛酸

There are a lot of things happened. I keep losing control of my temper recently. I miss the days we spent in the hometown. that is the perfect life i always looking forward to. Because he can balance the time with me, family and friends.



Recently, he does not spend a lot of time with me. I'm not requesting too much. I just feel unhappy and upset. He always say he accompanies me a lot. But in fact, when i was by his side, he always do his own things like dota with friends, watch online novels, msn with friends...We have very little time for private time~ Almost every weekend I go back home, I give him a lot of spaces and freedom for doing his own stuffs and accompanies friends especially 2 days of weekend and every night. For the daylight time, we go to different lecture. We have only one lecture is the same. So when is our private time? very little.



Yesterday night, something made me angry again. To guys, they will always think it was just a trivial matter. He said he never asked me along ytd cuz wanna have guys talk like dota debrief. But I hv really gave him many spaces for friends..Still not enough? When did I forbid him to interact with friends? But it was really too much. As his gf, I will feel lonely. Somemore, I just hope he can at least let me know when he is away. I always could not reach his hp. After I found out he went to eat supper and those friends are my close friends too! Do u understand why I gave such a big response? Guys talk? But there are gals too. Even though those gals were not calling by him, but that gathering is not counted as guys talk d..isn't it? I am his girlfriend...but friends always have priority.



I never snatch him away... Cuz I swear he spend everyday or even every seconds with friends~ Who cares about me? There are always some ppl tembak me about too sticky...but now I have changed a lot..I just need some cares and loves..and also private time with my boyfriend, is it too much?



I know he never scared I would leave him. From his response ytd when i asked this question, I know the answer. Sad... I dunno how long and how much I can take it. Why? Why everytime my love is not perfect? and totally different from what I expect. I hope my relationship can be as normal as other couples. I dun care how capable how rich how high the status my boyfriend is, I just need a boyfriend who really loves me, cares about me, dotes on me and needs me very much. That is what a girl wants.



I have also spend time with friends. But I know how to balance it. I will not give either boyfriend or friends priority. Cuz both are equally important to me. My friends give me spaces, my boyfriend gives me freedom too.



Sometimes I will envy other couples, I'm not comparing them, I just feel that why my relationship cannot be simple? My boyfriend is different. Our thinking also slightly different. I cannot take it. I worry I cannot take it anymore. Almost everytime when I need him by my side, he will not be there and accompanies friends. I'm very upset and disappointed. Cuz there is always someone else by my side when I was down. I dun want such a thing happens again. I dun like the feeling that always being left out. Everyday different friends emo, then he needs to acc different ppl. I wanna ask..when is my turn? anyone knows the answer?

突然觉得很寂寞

If I were blue, would you be there for me,

And whisper in my ears that's okay.

Would you stand by me, let me hold you tight,

And say you love me one more time.



If I feel good, would you slow dance with me,

And touch my lips with tender loving care,

Would you die for me, would you run with me,

And never look back..



Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,

to take my breath away?



Would you be there..



If I will wait, would you still think of me,

And wished that you could hold me now.

Would you die for me, would you run with me,

All the way..



Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,

to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be there,

to kiss my pain away..



Would you be there?

For me...